Isn’t it ironic?

I never tell Lebanese people where I live. I always lie. (And now that I’m blogging, everyone will know.) I live in Dahiye. I’ll try to avoid for now saying where exactly I live in Dahiye.

Those Lebanese people who do know where I live always express concern.

“Aren’t you scared? Is it safe?”

I don’t bother inviting them to my house. They won’t come. Only foreigners have come to my house. They’re not part of the social/class hierarchies that make them too good to come to “bad neighborhoods.” But also they don’t really know the reputations of all the neighborhoods.

So yesterday, Hamra, where I was living last year in that posh apartment with the ocean view, provided by my school (the most expensive in Lebanon), was in the middle of sniper fire and street fighting. Apparently, cars of masked snipers were cruising the streets—at Smith’s, Roadster, Malek al Batata, all places I frequent a lot. Check out the blog, Lebanese Political Journal. (It also gives an in-depth political analysis. I know the guy who writes it.)

And in the Dahiye, what’s happening? Yes, the gunfire, but that always happens before Nasrallah starts a speech and when it ends.

Otherwise, there’s nothing.

I actually always feel completely safe in the Dahiye.

The other day, a muhajaba neighbor (she wears the headscarf), told me she had to wait for a van at Cola the other night. I used to wait there all the time when I lived in Aley. Now I just take vans directly to Dahiye. I remember what it was like waiting at Cola, the skuzzy people, who will probably say skuzzy things. You have to always be on your guard, because if you’re out late at night as a female, and especially if you’re a foreigner, people think you’re a prostititute.

“Where are you from? Russia?”

That always makes me want to kick their ass. At that point, I go mute and I just stop talking to the person.

But now, I can come home at any time of night, walk home by myself, and feel perfectly safe. Where could that happen? Nowhere in the Western Hemisphere.

Nothing will happen here. You never hear stories of anything happening here. I live in a very high security zone. It’s considered a war zone all the time. This entails some restrictions. I can’t pull out my camera and take pictures. Someone (a security officer of HB) will come out of nowhere and ask to see the pictures and then usually delete them. But that’s their job. Not that Israeli spies are going to be using conspicuous Americans with their digital cameras. But whatever. I’m perfectly safe here.

The only threat to my person is Israel, whenever they decide they want to terrorize us with their Made in the USA bombs. I still get nervous when I hear that low drone of helicopters and planes. I guess it's the kind of trauma New Yorkers feel when they see random, unaccompanied packages.

Instead of hearing about purse snatchings and rape attacks, the only stories you hear is of someone dropping their wallet and it somehow managing to find its way back to the person. During the July War, HB had guards set up in all the banks, where the money was strewn all over the floor. The story goes—nothing was stolen.

Whether it’s true or not, we feel safe. No masked snipers are cruising our neighborhoods.

All you Beirutis are free to come stay with me if things get too hot in your fancier neighborhoods. But remember, we only have electricity half the time (and that has nothing to do with the current situation) and I live on the eighth floor. And sometimes we don't have electricity for a couple of days, so the water stops pumping, so we have to find other places to take showers and do the laundry. And, of course, people will start shooting their guns. So at those times, it's recommended to stay inside, because falling bullets do kill people. But, hey, I guess now you guys know what that's all about.

Hmmm. I guess I made some sort of political analysis here. When the situation is always shitty for some people, they don't care that the economy is hurt by an 18-month sit-in that shut down Downtown, or burning some tires. What does it matter to them? The government still takes money, and still doesn't fix their roads, or provide affordable phone service, or even provide electricity or water. Every new road is built with Hezbollah/Iran funds. All the public cisterns of potable water have Iranian flags on them. The only US flags you see are the ones that say Made in the USA over the bridges that were destroyed in the July War. If I take a certain route, my commute is at least one hour longer, because the van has to take a major detour around a major bridge (that two years later they're still trying to fix.) Thank God I usually take another route. If I had to go that way, I would be cursing the Americans/Israelis every day.