Black Application

Last year, my 9th grade students in the Bronx came up with an application to be black. Here it is:
(Thanks, Shakiaria, for giving me permission to post it.)
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Black Application

Name:

Mothers Address:

(usually Black Kids Dont Leave they mama house till they get kicked out) [age mim 3O+]

BBM pin: [Blackberry Messsenger] (Note : one aspect of being black is owning a BLACKBERRY ! if not pls run to your nearest phone store & Negotiate with the clerk .. Black ppl ALWAYS negotiate EVEN IF THE ITEM IS on sale .

1.Have You ever Shoplift? if so list how many times

2.How Many Times have you been arrested?

3.How Many warrants do you Have?

4. How Many Tickets Have You Not paid?

5. When is Your Next Court date?

6. Do You Have A Cousin Named Shaquana?

7.How Many R. Kelly CD's Do you Own?

8. Do You Use the Word "N-----" after every sentence?

9. Do You Drink a 4O with every Meal?

1O. Your Dream as a A Lil Kid, was 2 be in the NBA? (Guys ONLY)

11. Do You own a Frying Pan? (every black person Love to fry)

12. How Many ppl do u owe money to?

13. How Many Times have you changed your phone number
in a month?

14. How Many Baby Mothers Do You Have?

15. Do You feel there are kids out there you might not know about?

16. Do you Have a BJ's Membership Card? if Not Please go register for one A.S.A.P !

Please Be aware That Your Application would Not Be submitted if Your answers do Not Meet the required criteria!

Bonquisha Latique Laray Jackson
Supervisor of "I want 2 Be Black"offices

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There were other things in previous drafts that didn't make it to this final version:

17. How much watermelon is in your fridge?
18. What's your favorite chicken spot?
19. List all your family members--through birth or marriage, all halfs, steps, etc. (There were 3 pages for this part.)